Blog series - “Called to Care: Finding Meaning in the Midlife Caregiving Journey”
I never saw this chapter coming. But maybe... this is exactly where I was meant to be.
Week 1: When Life Rewrites Your Script
From Soldier to Full-Time Caregiver: The Unexpected Chapter of Purpose
They say life begins at 50—but I don’t think they meant caregiving, heartbreak, and grief all rolled into one. Yet for me, that’s exactly how this chapter started.
After serving 30 years in the U.S. Army, I had plans for retirement: travel, rest, maybe rediscovering a few passions I’d set aside while in uniform. Instead, I found myself back in the trenches—only this time, the mission was deeply personal.
Not long after hanging up my boots, my world shifted again. My marriage of over 20 years came to an end. I was emotionally raw, navigating the shock of divorce, unsure of who I was outside the roles I had lived for decades: soldier, spouse, and mother.
And then came the call to care.
My oldest brother, Clint—a proud U.S. Air Force veteran—was diagnosed with early onset Frontotemporal Dementia at just 54. Around the same time, our mom, Carol, received devastating news: her breast cancer had returned, now stage 4 and in her spine. Both needed care, and fast.
There was no blueprint. Just a decision: I brought them both into my home and became their full-time caregiver.
No more uniforms. No more certainty. Just day after day of managing appointments, medications, meals, emotions, and unpredictable moments of cognitive and physical decline. I had gone from Army operations to learning the rhythms of dementia care, from inspecting performance to inspecting pill organizers and managing bath and meal time. And truthfully? Some days, I didn’t know who I was anymore.
It wasn’t graceful. It wasn’t easy. But slowly, I realized something: life had rewritten my script, not erased it. All the years of leadership, service, and resilience had prepared me—just not in ways I had expected. I wasn’t fighting for a nation now. I was fighting for them—for Clint’s dignity, for Mom’s comfort, for the right to be heard in every hospital hallway and doctor's office.
This is the beginning of my story in midlife caregiving—not just about loss and sacrifice, but about finding strength when life calls you into unexpected service.
In this series, I want to explore the question I wrestled with in the dark moments:
"Is this my calling?"
Maybe you’ve asked yourself that, too.
Whether you’re just stepping into caregiving, or years into the journey, I invite you to walk with me as we look at how caregiving can break us open—and reveal purpose, even in pain.