Week 3: Joy Through Their Eyes.

As caregivers, we often become the ones who manage joy—trying to create it, protect it, or even just hold onto it in the smallest ways.

But sometimes the most unexpected blessing is this:
witnessing joy through their eyes.
And realizing, in that moment, your heart is healing too.

I’ve lived through more heavy days than I can count. I watched my brother Clint disappear slowly behind the veil of Frontotemporal Dementia. I walked beside my mother as cancer returned and robbed her of strength and independence.

But joy wasn’t gone.
It just looked different.
And it often showed up when I least expected it.

I remember one day vividly—Disco Day at the senior living community where Mom had recently moved.

She had been withdrawn in the weeks leading up to it, unsure of what her future held. We had moved her out of our home so she could receive more support, and the transition was tough. I worried we were losing her spirit, little by little.

But that day?
That day she put on these goofy glasses and headphones, laughed and danced! at the music. It wasn’t the dance floor of her youth—but it was her joy. Right there. In full color.

And I got to see it.

Then there was Clint.

His condition had progressed. Speech was unreliable. Emotions were often unpredictable. But when his daughter got married—he showed up in a way our family hadn’t seen in a long time.

He walked her down the aisle.

He stood tall, arm in arm with his little girl, and for those few minutes, he wasn’t the man fighting a neurological disease.
He was a proud father, giving his daughter away.

I will never forget the look in his eyes the pictures our sister Renee’ took that day.
Pride. Presence. Joy.

And I cried—not out of sadness, but out of overwhelming gratitude that not only our sister, but our mom got to witness that moment. That he and his daughter got to have that moment. That we all got to feel joy that big again, even if only for a moment.

These moments taught me something I now hold close:

Joy doesn’t have to be constant to be meaningful.
It just has to be witnessed.

Caregiving is often about showing up on the hard days.
But don’t miss this truth:
We are also given the rare honor of standing front row when something beautiful breaks through.

So if you’re in a hard season right now—tired, heart-weary, and uncertain—don’t stop looking for their eyes to light up. Because when they do, yours will too.

Most importantly, don’t stop looking for the joyful moments.